Tag: kindness

Motivational Monday

Hey friends!  So good to see you here!  I just want to say I really appreciate you reading what I have written.  It really means alot to me.  I HOPE I am true and accurate and I never lead someone astray.  If I do…please call me out.  🙂  Seriously.  But, I do appreciate you.

The other day, I was talking to someone about church, christianity, etc.  After talking to them, they informed me that they used to be a youth pastor.  In the same breath without skipping a beat, he said not only did he stop being a youth pastor but he stopped going to church.  I told him I hated to hear that and I asked him why.  He stated he was tired of dealing with judgmental hypocrites.  Well, you know what we have to do…let’s talk about it.

I grew up in a christian home and we went to church frequently but, at times, inconsistently.  When we settled into a church home, I’m not going to lie, I did not like it.  At the time, I was a kid and honestly had no say so in the decision of where to worship.  You see, the church my parent’s settled on had a private school.  I went to public school.  I didn’t “fit in” because they all knew each other from school.  And, honestly, they could be mean about what school I went to, what I was wearing, who I was wearing, what socioeconomic class we belonged to, why I didn’t know basic things about the Bible, etc.  

Here is an example of my thought process.  Hold up, hold up, hold up.  This is CHURCH??!  These kids are so mean!  We are in the house of the Lord!  What in the world??!  That’s it!  I hate church because EVERYONE HERE IS A HYPOCRITE!

Have you been there?  Clearly, I have and by my conversation with a friend, they are there currently.  In fact, this is the number one excuse I hear people say when you talk about christians and churches.  I’m not going to lie, I felt this way for years.  I didn’t go to church consistently until 12 years ago.  So what changed?  Did I find a perfect church with perfect people?  Nope.  Am I now suddenly perfect?  Absolutely NOT!  But did I change?  Yep.  I’ll explain.

“Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way as you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.  Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”  Matthew 7:1-5 

Jesus’s point here does not mean we can’t judge, we just can’t be hypocritical about it.  At the time when Jesus said this, there were religious leaders in the community who were GREAT at judging and not so great for holding themselves to the same standard they spoke of.  They were judgmental.

But understand, there is a difference between being judgemental and judging.  As Christians, we want our brothers and sisters in Christ to be the best they can be. We want those who don’t know Christ, to be their best and accept Him as their Lord and savior. So, it IS ok to hold people accountable for their actions and yes…we have to judge them in order to correct them.  But this judgment comes from love and not pride or hate.

Judgmental attitudes stem from pride.  Seeing someone struggle or make mistakes can make you think, “Whew!  At least I’m better off than them!”  Not cool.  It’s that attitude that just ranked their sin.  Where did your sin rank when you thought that??!  Why do we feel the need to rank sins?  Does it make us feel better in our own sinful behavior?

So what changed in me?  I had to understand that we are all not perfect.  We all sin because we live in a fallen world.  You might sin differently than me but I still sin.  And just because we sin differently doesn’t make me or you better than one another.  

So this week, I want to work on 4 things if you see yourself as a the judger or the judgee (I know that’s not a word but it works! 🙂)  First, look inward at your own sins.  Recognize where you fall short.  Second, reflect on the reasons why they believe what they believe.  Is it something you identify with?  Third, realize no one has all the answers except God.  So if there is a question about right and wrong, go to His word.  Lastly, RESPECT other people, even if they reject God’s way.  Yep.  Do it.  That doesn’t mean you agree or accept that behavior,  but respect the person.  I promise they are watching your behavior/response and they will remember it.  You don’t want to be the hypocrite they remember.

Side note- if I have judged you (because I know, at times, I have fallen short in this category), I am sorry.  Please know that when I write these motivations, I think about all the times I have been THAT hypocrite and it’s something I work on daily.  Thank you for accepting me, faults and all.

 

Love you all,

Jennifer

 



Motivational Monday

The 5 “L’s” of Life Series

Hey friends!  Today is the last day of our series and I have to say, I have really enjoyed writing it.  To have started off with, “How in the world am I going to write about this?” to “Oh, I kinda enjoyed this series!” is a huge win for me.  😂  That thought actually made me giggle a little when I wrote it…which is a PERFECT segway into today’s last topic.  Laughter.  So, let’s talk about it.

Listen, I LOVE to laugh.  I laugh at the wrong times and right times!  😣  Fun fact about me (like you don’t know enough)!  I laughed the whole way through my wedding ceremony.  Yep.  True story.  When I think of my best friend Samantha, I can literally hear her laughter.  Her laugh makes me laugh!  Laughing makes me feel good.  It brings me closer to the person I am laughing with.  But have you ever thought about laughter from a christian aspect?  I’ll be honest, I have never thought about it so let’s take a go at it!

So from a health perspective, what does laughter do for us?  Well, it has been proven that laughter lowers blood pressure and stress hormones.  There have been times I am annoyed with my husband and he will cut the tension with a “funny”.  And 9/10 times, my mood is much better.  Proverbs 17:22 says, “A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.”  Laughter wasn’t a by-product from emotions.  God knew exactly what we needed with laughter.

Laughter is a response to God’s love and grace.  I think about the movie, Steel Magnolias.  At the end of the movie when M’lynn is having a meltdown over Shelby’s death (and rightfully so), Clairee throws Ousier in the mix by offering M’lynn a “once in lifetime opportunity to knock Ouiser out!”  Life presents us with good times and bad.  There is a “time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance.”  Ecclesiastes 3:4

Can you imagine a life without laughter?  More than likely, we only know pain, grief, and just melancholy.  Right?  What if we only ONLY experienced joy?  Listen, pain and suffering are a part of God’s plan in your life.  Those things draw you closer to Him.  Laughter is a part of ups and downs of life.  David says in Psalm 16:11, “You make known to me the path of life; You will fill me with joy in Your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.”  David not only shared his sadness with the Lord but his joy.  Laughter is part of relationship building.  With people and God!

But do you know what I see when people laugh?  Faith.  Let me explain.  Has there ever been a time in your life when something is eating at you?  Or you have extreme sadness?  Or you have a loved one in the hospital?  And all you can do is pray.  You’re worried.  And then one day, it’s like you let go and suddenly a little chuckle comes out of you.  It’s hard to laugh when you feel unsafe.  By allowing laughter to return, you are trusting Him to help you through this time.  Laughter helps us know that God is good and that He has a plan for us. By laughing, we also share His love, grace, and joy with others. So, let us laugh more often, and let our laughter reflect our soul.  

So this week, I want to challenge you to a game.  This is a made up “Jennifer” game (ask Jon!  This is a real game I play).  When you go shopping this week, I want you to make your cashier laugh.  I’ll give you a hint as to how to open them up to laughter…say something positive about them first.  Ask them questions about THEM.  Then, have a conversation as they are ringing you up.  Get them to laugh.  I want you to take note of their face from beginning to end.  Look at how you impacted their stress level for what…3-5 minutes?  It’s amazing.  God did that.

Love you all and see you Sunday,

Jennifer

 

Motivational Monday

July 8, 2024

Hey friends!!  Just want to check in with you and see how your week was last week.  I hope it is great but if it was less than that, don’t fret…we have this week.  🙂  It’s ok.  Sometimes we have to take it a day at a time.  Which is why I chose this week’s topic!  What does the Bible say about being nice to others?  As Christians, do we have to be nice all the time? 

If you have read these motivations for any length of time, you probably know me well by now.  I am christian who struggles daily; but, man do I love the Lord!!  And for the record, I work on my struggles daily.  I really do.  But earlier this week, I had to give myself a talkin’ to about being nice.  “Jennifer.  That was ugly.  Be nice.”  Truth be told, I think I gave myself that talk a couple times last week.   The main reason I told myself WHY I should be nice is because I’m christian.  And that’s when it hit me…Jesus wasn’t always “nice”.  Jesus was kind.  Oftentimes as Christians, we equate the two as biblical kindness.  But that isn’t true.  So…let’s talk about it!

So first, let’s talk about being nice.  The word “nice” is really generic.  I had an English teacher that would lower your grade by 10 points if you used the word “nice” in any paper that was turned into her.  If you look the word up in the dictionary the definition is, “pleasant; agreeable; satisfactory”.  So in my mind, being nice can sometimes be fake.  But, did you also know it comes from the Latin word nescius or nescience which means ignorant or ignorance.  Also, did you know that no major Bible translation contains the word, “nice”?  But I get it, sometimes, it’s easier to be “nice” than disagree with someone (notice I didn’t say argue).

Well, Jennifer, why is kindness so much different?  GLAD YOU ASKED!!

True biblical kindness is really deep.  It’s not topical or fake…ever.  True kindness can only be obtained through abiding in Christ.  If you look at a tree, you can’t have limbs without a trunk, right?  Your faith is the trunk.   Kindness is a branch.  You can’t have kindness without faith.  

Kindness isn’t always nice.  I know, this is confusing.  Listen, kindness is brave, fierce and daring.  It’s fearless and selfless.  It is not timid or frail.  Can you be those things and be “nice” all the time?  ABSOLUTELY not!  Being kind is telling others things they don’t want to hear.  

Let me give you an example.  You have a friend who can be emotional at times (you can insert any emotion in this scenario and it will work).  This friend, who is not married, is having an affair with a married person.  There’s a whole lot wrong here, right?  What do YOU do as their friend?  DO you listen and say, “Whatever, it’s their life”?  Do you say, “Well, they aren’t doing anything wrong because they aren’t married”?  Or do you KNOW it’s wrong but don’t say anything because they will blow up or cry?  Kindness is telling them they are wrong.  Kindness is pointing out why it’s wrong and how that doesn’t glorify God.  And guess what?  That conversation is NOT going to be fun but you did it.  And that makes you…kind.  Even if they don’t see it. But I promise, they heard you and they will think about what you said even if they disagree.

You know you better than anyone, right?  Even your spouse or best friend doesn’t know EVERYTHING about you.  You have had thoughts and feelings that you shouldn’t.  So, if you said and did everything you thought or felt, do you think people should show you absolute kindness?  Of course not!  That’s why we don’t act on all of our thoughts and feelings, right?  So, why is God kind to you?  You don’t have to act on those thoughts and feelings because He knows!  He knows your heart.  

This week, show kindness.  I promise there are so many ways you can do this on a daily basis.  You just have to look for it.  By showing someone kindness, you are displaying the love of Christ.  

I pray this week is a great week for all of you!

Love you all,

Jennifer

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